Category Archives: Life

Girl on the Run

I have a confession to make. It is no secret that I have not posted in awhile, but the fact that I have lost motivation and inspiration is a sad reality. There have been moments that I did want to write but found no time, or choose well…I will just say it….to party! Heck, it has been a great whooping crazy fun summer!

The last couple of days have really put me back on my feet and in touch with my center. When I needed help and asked for it, friends and the universe were there for me. Its great when you have your eyes open and can identify those little signs of God reaching out. I’ve not only fallen off the running band wagon, its just been a whole lifestyle that I have adopted and strayed away from the past few months.

A couple of days ago when I posted to Facebook “I need help getting back on the running bandwagon”, I receive an amazing e-mail from an old friend whom I have not seen in almost 2 years that she too is now seeking balance though running and trying new things in life and I unknownlingy inspired her. Then today I recieved this wonderful card in the mail!

The main reason I set a goals is to encourage others to be healthy (mainly my family), I’ve ultimately become the winner because living a healthier life has made me happier!  So I set a new goal a month back, to complete my first 10K Big House Big Heart and I made a donation to a non-profit called Girls on the Run. I didn’t know much about the organization but that they did good by preparing girls for a lifetime of self-respect and healthy living through running and activities. Today they sent me the best hand written card in the mail that reminded me of why I am doing what I’m doing and what has always been my goal, to encourage girls/women to be happy and healthy! What a great way to say thank you. I will continue to support this program and I hope if your interested in it you will too!

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Third Eye

I’ve always know what it is but not known exactly how to use it and haven’t really seen it. I still have a long ways to go to learn how to use it but I finally saw it and began to use it.  Does anyone know what this is???.

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It is my 3rd Eye and really my Invincible Summer. It is this playground located between my 2 eyes that is a bright glowing light and a place I can go to lead me in the right direction. That direction is to a higher level and elevation upward and inward and that brings me closer to my spiritual leader God. The other day when I was in Yoga class I just saw it and felt it pull me up and forward and inward. I always feel so close to myself in Yoga and God is within us.

I took these passages out from my teachings “The Fall of the Human Intellect” written by Guru A. Parthasarathy.

Old Testament: The voice of God declares, ” I am that I am”.

New Testament: Jesus Christ affirms, “The kingdom of God is within you.”

Quran: Prophet Mohammed asserts, “The greatest jihad is that for the conquest of self.”

Bhagavad-Gita: Krishna pronounces, “I am the Self in all beings.”

Upanishads: The Rishis (Enlightened Sages) avow, “Self is God”.

So through finding my 3rd eye it has given me a door into my real self that is a bright light shinning and it is where I can begin to find peace and bliss because peace and bliss are being closer to God.

Namaste

Half Moon

All I had to do was open my heart. Every time I try this I wobble, loose my balance and most times just fall over and laugh that this pose seems to throw me off. Today though, I figured it out. All I had to do was open my heart. When you are ready, you are ready and TODAY I was ready. As I lifted my right fingers tips to the sky, breathed deeply with one foot planted on the ground, strength through my left leg, I turned my chest to the sky and opened my heart!

What a day, my favorite moment of the day was just that little moment. When you connect your mind with your body it is deeper than just a twist to the left or right and turning your head towards the ceiling. I connected with myself. My mind wasn’t on yesterday or tomorrow but it was right there in the room on my mat that I connected with a higher power that lifted me up and helped me move past my fears, not my fears of falling over but the fear to open my heart!

Namaste

Night Owl to Early Riser in 30 days….

The formula has worked!  No meat, no caffeine, no alcohol, studying The Fall of the Human Intellect every morning, and no hanky panky, wait did I just say no Hanky Panky? Yes that is part of the formula….and I’m up at 6:00 am on a Saturday morning with only 2.5 hours of sleep and feel fully alert and ready for the world! All of this is part of the lifestyle changing formula. I really had to give myself a month or so to do it because in the beginning I went through the headaches of no coffee, and withdrawals of my favorite foods but once I began to see the benefits I was able to start reasoning with my intellect vs. emotions and attachments like I need this or I need that to survive!

Just a couple of weeks ago I put on my facebook status “How do you change your habits and become a morning person, even though you’ve been a night owl your whole life?”. I got answers like “have kids, drinking before bed so you have to get up early and go pee, get an early morning JOB”. These are all answers that FORCE yourself to get out of bed in the morning but how about doing it by choice?  Good answers but the formula above helped me change my mind set and make physical changes in my body that have allowed me to become a morning person.

And I’m fucking shocked by this one simple change I’ve seen in myself. I never thought it was possible that is why I had to use the F word…because I’m just that surprised by my behavioral changes. A month ago I would have talked myself into going back to bed because the mere thought of only getting 2.5 hours of sleep must indicate that I need more sleep. I mean its pure logic right? Actually it is not, the pure logic is if you are not tired wake up and get your ass out of bed!

This is one of the many changes I have seen over the past month, but one that I have been trying on my own to accomplish for the past 1o years.  I do not think, “now that I have accomplished it I own it and can do it every day”.  It will take daily work to keep up this practice and change.  On a side note now that my 30 days are almost up I will be continuing many of the sacrifices I have made with slight modifications that fit my true self.

Listen to your intellect, reason out what really is the logic and make that change you want to see but be consistent daily and you too can make it happen!

Namaste

Warrior Weekend

What won’t kill you will only make you stronger.  The above image is from a weekend I spent with my sorority sisters that changed my life.  We called it “Warrior Weekend”.  I suspect my long weekend beginning tomorrow will be another Warrior Weekend… a life changing experience, after all it is called Life Training.  Most people think a Yoga Retreat sounds relaxing, indeed it is going to be a way to balance ourselves out but I’m not sure about relaxing.  The website asks, “Are you seeking information and knowledge?  To understand yourself better and the world around you?  Tools to make change in your life?  To teach Yoga and build a business around the Yoga philosophy?  Begin your journey to clarity”.  I’m nervous, excited, curious, motivated, and anxious all at the same time.  I guess its because I’m ready.  Ready to make a change, to work on whatever it is that is holding me back from completely fulfilling what I know I can accomplish.  No communication with the outside world until Mid-Monday.  Can’t wait to share all about it.

Namaste.

Affirmations

7.) I want everybody to respect me.

8.) I want to be able to reason out good decisions.

9.) I want to have fun.

10.) I want to be happy with myself.

11.) I want to enjoy everyday.

12.) I want to do only the things that make me proud.

13.) I want to accept the truth.

14.) I want to find good in everybody.

15.) I always want to be myself.

1.) I never want to be jealous.

2.) I never want to put anybody down.

3.) I never want to be scared of what tomorrow may bring.

4.) I never want to judge people.

5.) I never want to indulge.

6.) I never want to disrespect myself.

7.) I never want to act out of character.

8.) I never want to quit what I know I can accomplish.

9.) I never want to be mean.

10.) I never want to wish to be something that I am not.

11.) I never want to lie to myself.

12.) I never want to blame others for my mistakes.

I took a class in high school, I can’t remember what it was called but it was along the lines of life skills.  We talked about healthy relationships, being a healthy person mentally and honestly I can’t remember what else.  It was either 11th or 12th grade.  What I do remember is that it was first period and I always walked out of class feeling alive and happy!  One of the exercises we did was to write down affirmations.  Above is about what I wrote.  I have my original notes from class and I still look at them regularly.  Sometimes I just read them one by one until one sticks out to me at that moment and I try to meditate on the words throughout the day.  It reminds me of what kind of person I want to be.  From time to time I loose my way and I look at this and think, “how did I know myself better at 17 then I do today?”  Was I more honest with myself?  Less tainted with the temptations of society?  Hadn’t felt as much pain and worry in life?

I think this is a good way to start or end your day because there is something powerful in simple words, written down, and said out loud.

Namaste.

Fear Nothing

Getting suited up to jump 14,000 feet out of a plane

I had my interview for Live Training a couple of months ago.  I think they conduct interviews to just make sure you are not suicidal or going to be a liability to the group.  Either way, it felt good that I was accepted!  One of the things that Steve (One of the owners of Yoga Shelter) and I talked about was conquering your fears.  He said we would be focusing on the topic of fear quite a bit during our retreat.  Hmm..Fear?  “Fear is something I really don’t know anything about” I told him.  Nothing really scares me, heights…no, spiders..no, love…no, being alone in life….nope not that either!  So emotionally and mentally I feel pretty darn strong.  Then a couple of nights ago, I woke up from a light sleep.  I’m not sure if I was just dreaming but it just popped into my head.  My FEAR!  How could this be?  I told myself to just go back to bed and not think about it again and it will just go away.  I guess we all fear something, but I felt my fears were nothing major.  I shouldn’t need to go on a retreat to address it.

So here it was, my subconscious had awakened me.  It was like a confession to myself in my head, “I fear that I will miss out on something really important in life”.  What does that mean?  As I tossed and turned for the rest of the night, was I thinking about kids?  What if I decided not to have any kids, will I look back one day and have regrets?  What if I don’t see enough of the world that I once wanted to in life, will I regret it?  Will I regret if I never open my own business one day, or write a book…dreams I’ve had since I was young?    My heart began to race as I was thinking about these things. My chest gets tight now as the anxiety sets in while I write this down.  I feel like I’m up against the clock and its almost April 2010….2010, do you hear me????  How is it that 1/4 of the year has already passed?  Time feels like it’s escaping me.  Do you remember the show Out of this World, I use to want to have her super powers, where you could just put your fingers together and stop time.  That way I would never miss anything.  The funny thing is I love to sleep, you would think if I didn’t want to miss anything I wouldn’t sleep as much.  Oh well dreaming is sweet too 🙂

As I continue my journey, I am really looking forward to learn how to live in the present and not focus on the future so much and what I may be missing out on.  We all need to appreciate the moment while it is happening and the people who we are spending it with, I think this will bring more peace.

Having spent the better part of my life trying either to relive the past or experience the future before it arrives, I have come to believe that in between these two extremes is peace.  ~Author Unknown

Paz